.. g*mEmories ..

2011-05-25T11:34:00.000-07:00

if only u can make me believe that you'll give me happiness..

2011-05-25T11:31:00.000-07:00

i dont want to envy people.
i want others to envy me.. just for once.

2011-05-20T10:17:00.000-07:00

I suddenly got the feeling to blog so here i am (:
well, today i started off with a bad day. now it's only 10:06am. and it's already a bad day. i dare not imagine the later part of the day.

i felt so bad and guilty. i dont know what to do..
i disturbed Pei Qi last midnight and today, i woke her up by smsing her early in the morning.. i'm so very inconsiderate!!!!!! :((((((
she told me it's not my fault, but i know it's mine.. I hope PeiQi won't feel cranky today.. i cannot forgive myself :(

bad day, so i went for my best remedy. it helps a lil, but not totally.

well, since he doesn't like letting ppl know our problems, i shall not say anymore. but treat me nicer at least??? all i can say is, dont regret if anything happens :)
of course, i will not do or say silly things about threatening my own life. this is insanely childish and it's an irresponsible thought.

i felt better penning down my thoughts.
hope people ard me - friends and families will have a much better day than i do (:

2011-01-11T23:26:00.000-08:00

BUSINESS LAW

ECONS

I feel the stress.. :(
kinda scary.. i just wish i wont flung this semester..
2 more modules.. accounting and biz statistics..
oh Noooos! God please save me!

bye-bye 2010

2010-12-31T14:12:00.000-08:00

Everyone is bidding 2010 goodbye in fb. So.. i shall follow the norm. HAHA.
Nah, the real reason is.. I'm too bored now!! It seems as though I'm wasting my last day of 2010 right now. But i guess, it's just the beginning of the day?
Prolly i will get more excited when the sun goes down and skies turn dark totally? (:
Not too sure, but well, let's see how.

Okay, side track abit, I didn't sleep well last night. Had another weird dream, and i totally forgot what i dreamt about last night. i woke up at 5+ am and can hardly get back to sleep. My neck is very stiff now and damn i wish my neck can just drop off and roll on the ground. heavy max!

Back to saying bye-bye 2010.. One year just.. pffff! gone like that. so what have i achieved in this one year?
Honestly, there are really quite a number of things achieved and I thank God for all these achievements (:

This year, I will welcome 2011 in church. I thought this could be very meaningful, counting down with the presence of God. How wonderful.. :D

Resolutions Resolutions ..
what resolutions do i have for 2011.
i shall write down somewhere in my diary (:

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO UUUU READERS/BLOG HOPPERS.
May u have a blessed year ahead.

2010-12-20T16:59:00.000-08:00

having a dream can really affect my feelings, thoughts, emotions, decisions and actions.
sigh, it's a nice dream but ... i doubt any changes can be made now.

im gg out for a walk soon :]

2010-12-13T08:01:00.000-08:00

i think im having serious pms. who cares anyway. all girls do that, dont they?
i've disappoint my sis and i was so hurt by what my dad said to me earlier on. he should be angry with me now anyway. i'm utterly disappointed with them too.
BUT thanks to them, i've become more determined.
determine what? i wont mention here cux i think this is my personal problem and i will solve it myself.
until now, mum doesn't know anything about it and i think it makes no difference if she learnt about it.

at the very least, i've been taught something.
i learnt that no matter how perfect something may seem to be,it can never be; everything is imperfect..

2010-11-27T15:08:00.000-08:00

i've been wasting my holidays. shd've find a proper part time job & earn some bucks instead. anyhow, i want to rest on my first sch hols in uni life (: i know, im sucha a lazy person.

today we're gonna celebrate grandma's birthday at the coffee shop below my blk (:
im sure it will be a good one!!

im seriously bored, especially on Saturdays!!! hoho i had my longest sleep last night! and i woke up 2hrs ago. went jb last night with sis n all. had ramly burger and i swear it was so sinful!! my face is so bloated now!!
i need a jog badly!!! can't wait for the coming SCMS!! (: SOOOOO EXCITED!

anyway, this is just a random post la. i didn't intend to do any blogging initially. HAHA.

have a BLASTFUL day, people!

2010-10-23T22:37:00.000-07:00

i know i shouldn't be here at this moment but im here to take a breather..
i thought i should pen down some of my thoughts here to make me feel better and i hope it works.

first paper will be approaching within 48hrs and the 2nd paper the following day. there are so many chapters to cover and im dyingggggg. seriously dying. so what if i read through and take down notes for every chapt? can i totally rem one whole chapt? nah, i can't. i dont want to spot on any chapter though. i just hope im able to clear all chapters before paper starts!

honestly, i've never been so stressed up and worried for my studies; not even for O levels, i swear. i've coped myself at home for a week and there are many things i wanna do after exams! errr..provided my grades are okay for me to enjoy this coming holidays.
oh ya, side track a bit, i found a savior this week (:

i just hope God will answer all prayers made from me and my sweet people. That's all im asking for now. Alright, shall continue drowning myself with books n notes!!

2010-09-12T23:43:00.000-07:00

i did thought of deleting my fb account.
should i?

Regrets

2010-09-09T23:27:00.000-07:00

ppl live with regrets. so do i.

in any case, we were the one who made decisions..

so what can i do?.... and why do i feel like crying now?

2010-08-27T23:32:00.000-07:00

I need to get things started!!!! like NOW..

2010-08-23T22:27:00.000-07:00

angry, disappointed.
but what can i do?

literally NOTHING.
i feel real lousy and you know nothing about me.

stop asking why.
i hate answering "Why" questions.

a new phase of life;

2010-08-09T23:20:00.000-07:00

somehow, my life has changed now.
uni life is absolutely different from how we were in secondary and in poly. I know i can't compare but i'd always reminisce those days; how we were spoon-fed by our teachers, giving us tons of notes, the way they concerned about our attendance and how we behaved in class, they'd got mad when our work was not done on time, giving us extra lessons/tuitions, concerning about our grades and many many more down the list..
well, all these are no longer applicable in my life.

I gotta start a new life and be all ready to accept it. though i just started it, but i'm not quite used to it. slowly.. trying to adapt ..

3 days of work at penguin during my weekends/holidays were awful. i hate being tied down by Penguin again.. i should learn to be more determine and hard-hearted now.. why force myself to do things i'm not happy to do?

I'm very very very tired now.
shall do my rantings some other day (:
goodnight, earthlings.

definition of lousy

2010-07-23T12:39:00.000-07:00

adj., -i·er, -i·est.
1.Infested with lice.
2.Extremely contemptible; nasty: a lousy trick.
3.Very painful or unpleasant: a lousy headache.
4.Inferior or worthless: a lousy play.
5.Slang. Abundantly supplied: lousy with money.

no.4 describes me right now

full stop

free like a bird now

2010-07-18T23:42:00.000-07:00

im officially outta work. it's a good and bad thing.
school will be commencing in 2 weeks time. it's pretty short actually cuzzz time flies. i bet getting back to student life is way better than working. but being a poor student? it's a nightmare. im going to have this nightmare!!

i wanna get some things done ASAP! to lighten my burden. once it's done, i will start it all over again, right from the start. i feel like im so pathetic right now! :(

on a random note...
i wish someone could tell me what to do next.
sometimes, im at a total lost. this sucks.

what will happen next? how are things gonna be like?
only if i know..
well, that's life.

2010-07-16T00:12:00.000-07:00

no one understands how i'm feeling right now. .

everyone is telling me the same thing.
'don't disturb you'
yeah, do what you said and just leave me alone.
thank you.

i wish i can faint right now.

my dearest boy..

2010-07-01T23:17:00.000-07:00

A 3 year old boy made me smiled when I was at the lowest point.
He made me smiled again when I find it hard to force myself a fake smile.
Amazingly..
Just by a word from him can do wonders in my life.
Just by shouting for me when he heard the sound of my keys at the doorstep..
Just by telling me he hasn't seen me for a day and misses me.
made my heart smiled and hugged him so tightly.

Perhaps, this is what i define as LOVE.

And now.. he's 4 years old..

mentally vs physically

2010-06-18T01:40:00.000-07:00

you may not know what you've done to upset me. you may be ignorant about it but to me it's a big thing. Maybe something u did has become a habit to me and for once if u didnt fulfil it, i will get so disappointed and dissatisfied. Why do i really care so much?
Or im just thinking too much. Or has the med got me into depression?
What am i now?

doc, finally.

2010-06-08T23:05:00.000-07:00

visited the doc finally!!!! i can't stand myself coughing when im outside anymore... sigh sigh sigh.

vomited last midnight! TORTUROUS.

the bill cost me a bomb!!! :( that is the reason why i always hate visiting doc .. BOOOOO!

always sick at the wrong time; always rejected mc (cux i dont need it) boohooo.

time to sleep. gotta work tmR! :D

turn in

2010-06-08T00:13:00.000-07:00

okay! i decided to sleep now after a long day; work & movie & barrage! :D

GOOD NIGHT

z z z

rolling tears & bursting lungs

2010-05-31T23:41:00.000-07:00

my tears rolled down when i was coughing so so so badly!!!! yes.. i cried and eyes were red even until the end of work.. amazing huh?

i guess my lungs were pumping ferociously when i was coughing huh? yea. it hurts somehow. my throat too. and the feeling of vomiting, but nth comes out is very sucky lah. not even the phlegm. EEEWs.

hahahaha. apart from how lousy i was feeling.. even till now..!!,

today marks my last day of work @ tuas. a sigh of relief and the feeling of freedom. after the bus passed by the co. my heart sunk immediately. the reminisces i had for the past 2 mths will never be forgotten.

feeling empty now :(

2010-05-28T23:09:00.000-07:00

I HATE COUGHsssss!!! :( it's irritating, noisy and painful!!! for the first time, i asked marmie for cough medi but she insisted that i can't take it :( consumed some medication to reduce phlegm earlier on.

arghhhh....... i need that cough pill that will make me drowsyyyy!!! my hse used to have it. but now? idk.

caught Prince of Persia and i thought it was not bad (: though i really dislike that cinema!! smelly n stuffy!!! BOOOHOOO! it was the companion that matters most(: short meet up but it was great. we shall have a longer session soon huh.

i need to keep myself reminded that today is FRIDAY!!! NOT SATURDAY!!

for goodness sake. i keep thinking that tmr is a sunday.. how confusing..

i guess im turning in early tonight. goooooooodnight!

terrible; need you now

2010-05-24T23:11:00.000-07:00

my looks are horrendous!! lack or sleep or falling ill? i don't know.. something's wrong..

had a sudden headache and super dry n itchy throat @ work :(

colleague commented that my eyes looked weird today and i totally agree. oh no....

received the long awaited letter (:

2 more months to sch starts. how great! :D

addicted to the song "Need You Now by Lady Antebellum". awesome (:

exactly how i feel sometimes..

time to rest, goodnight.

2010-05-23T17:43:00.000-07:00

eyes sored suddenly last night. and many were saying my eyes are swollen/red. it's kinda sucky and my face just look so w.e.i.r.d partly is becuz im deprived of sleep. i barely sleep last night and slept near 5am.

i hate to sleep angry too. it sucks TOTALLY, for goodness sake.

the following day wont be a pleasant one, for sure. what can i do? tell me...?

im in a dilemma whether to have a nap now or not to. argh. why am i bothered by such minor issue? yea, i hate myself at times like that.

everything is not so right actually. bye.

just some random thoughts

2010-05-22T14:17:00.000-07:00

finally it's saturday. but i smell boredom today :( err...

anyway, i had a wonderful breakfast(or issit lunch? whatever) with marmie and papa. 3 of us had a wonderful conversation again. it's nice, as usual.

sometimes.. i want to have the best. the best of some things. can i have it?

God knows.

oh well.. i suddenly got the urge of.... doing something unusual. but i can't figure what is it. oh damn.

Poly Graduation

2010-05-18T22:28:00.000-07:00

a part of memories to be kept.

random; CORN SNACKS

2010-05-18T22:22:00.000-07:00

okay, i've been dozing off while doing work these 2 days. it's terrible. i need 48hrs of sleep luh.

on a random note, i miss the corn snacks @ daiso. but i couldn't find it that time :( awws.

vexed about some things. argh.

i've been spending 90% of my free days outside recently. it's so unhealthy. isn't really the life i want. i need rest. but on another hand, i wish to spend time with my friends. . . only if i have 101% energy every single day.. everything would be possible.....

busy weekends

2010-05-16T14:44:00.000-07:00

totally worn out after one week full of events; work, graduation, chalet, church wedding. wedding dinner later on. had a 7hr nap yesterday but still not enough as i couldn't sleep early last night. when will the tired feeling vanish?

10 more days to end work!! i don't feel like working for now.. i need a break from work.

i will regret for sure.. but wellssss..

i shall go catch some sleep now! :D

goodnight. teehee.

caught a nap, finally.

2010-05-12T20:30:00.000-07:00

off days are gone. but it was a fruitful one ytd though there were frustrations. had a meet up with the guys and lynda for dinner after grad ceremony. updates for graduation are still KIV. photos in sis's dcam.

had a nap just now but i'm still feeling so tired.. . no mood for a proper meal. don't know what i want now. maybe ice cream? (: i shall stock up more tubs.

i jolly well know that i need income for myself but why am i anticipating the last day of working? im outta my mind.

i yearn for another overseas trip. but when?...

work starts tomorrow :( BORING.

sometimes, the day is just not urs.

we can doing nothing but to accept it.

oh well, damn it.

i miss tioman now

2010-05-02T22:58:00.000-07:00

:D memories are locked.

returned

2010-04-28T22:43:00.000-07:00

back from tioman on sunday(: AWWWWWWWEESOME!

i'd love to go back and visit another island.. phuket & redang & bali too!!

i want to stay there and never return:D

*pics soon:)

tioman loves!

2010-04-18T22:54:00.000-07:00

awesome thing! can't wait for friday nowwwww!! hurry hurry!(:

finally gonna chop my pp after soooooo long..

hopefully able to watch sunrise and sunset. awwww..... nicest thing on earth.

soooo ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ LOVE ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ !!!

thursday

2010-04-16T00:02:00.000-07:00

this week passes so quickly(: it's friday again tmr! wow~

spent my thursday fruitfully after work today. it has been so long!

aweeeesome.

i guess i need to know the road well. sigh :(

well, i miss school.

i miss first day of school. i miss travelling to rp. i miss friends at rp. i miss everything..

and today, im reminded that i have graduated from poly.

i need to figure what i want.

all i need is time.

2010-04-13T08:38:00.000-07:00

i've no energy to blog:(

the weather in the morning was horrendously humid but the weather in the evening is so love!

it will be nice to sleep in tonight.

gdnight.

friday is nearing!

2010-04-08T22:29:00.000-07:00

WEEE. yes! TGIF :D

i need to post this so badly cux i'm so excited about friday nowwwww. i got to do this now if not friday would be over by the time i log into my blogger acct.

i finally experienced the meaning of 'TGIF' after working from 8-5 kind of job. oh wells.. (:

i smell my rest day(: coooool.

somehow, somewhat i miss working at PFS now..

i miss supervisor's loudest voice within the whole harbourfront premises. how cool can she be hah. &&& i miss ah seng's singing, so badly!! aiyos.

it's time to start....

outta control:(

last day of march'10.

2010-04-08T00:03:00.000-07:00

Thanks for the surprise and thought; trying to put a smile on my face on that lousy lousy day.

3 days of working at tuas.. i like the working environment down there, the room/dept im in. at least there's radio to accompany us throughout the whole working hours, else i will be dead for sure. haha!

getting sick? not now please..

wrong time.

Time to sleep.

G'night!

hot air balloon.

2010-04-04T08:29:00.000-07:00

suddenly got the urge to take a ride on a hot air balloon. for don't know what reason.

im crazy! only if sg has it. hmm does it?

finally went to grandma's and today was slightly special as we celebrated 5th aunt birthday(:

as usual, it was bored to stay at grandma's. almost fell asleep while watching tv program with the rest. hoho. grandmama's legs are getting weaker and hair turns extremely white :( somehow, it hurts my heart..

on a side note, i don't know if i'm happy or sad to stop working at harbourfront. i guess both feelings. i will definitely miss Ah Seng!! haha. my pistachio(kai xin guo), my happy pill :D i willmiss him singing and whistling his favourite tune. ahh! soo much fun!

in anyway, i hope i wont get lost in tuas tmr!(:

rainy night.

2010-04-03T23:09:00.000-07:00

woots. i love rainy days! it's so awesome and perfect to tuck yrself in bed and hide under the soft blanket(: soooo LOVE!

unfortunately, i can't enjoy this today. it started pouring when i was out for work and during my work? it was drizzling when i knocked off today. sucha cold night. i guess tonight will be a wonderful night to sleep in!(:

i've wasted my whole morning:( pretty upset for not doing what im supposed to do. to think that i set my alarm last night and to wake up early for it. damn thing.. im sucha disappointment. i need some self-discipline..

having said that, i woke up very early and rotted half of the entire day at home, and when it's time for work, i'm feeling very sleepy!:( no energy to work too. ha. how terrrrrrible!

feel like vomiting the whole day. why?

weee! i got to eat popeyes mashed potato after work! thanks sis for helping me to buy!(:

long friday.

2010-04-02T23:37:00.000-07:00

today seems to be a very long day for me. rushed down for work from church in the morning and no movie in the end:( pretty sad bout it. no program kills during weekend!!

i landed myself in living room watching drama shows from 7pm to 11pm. awesome though. it's been sooooo freakin' long since i sit down with marmie and watch tv tgt.

she asked me to sleep with her tonight. hoho. still considering. HAHA.

i feel bored the whole day. grrr!!

weeee! last day tmr at harbourfront (for the time being) *escapes!

things change overnight.

2010-04-01T01:28:00.000-07:00

should we believe in plans? tell me, anyone?

but maybe not now...

some of my plans for this april are vanished. having said that, i won't be committing myself at harbourfront. im gg to commit myself to hq from monday onwards, for a short period of time. but am still a part time at harbourfront(; both good and bad.. i smell freedom on weekends but inflexibility of off days:(

things are slowly getting in place now. .. i guess?

one decision made may cause changes in everything.

last remedy.

2010-03-31T23:57:00.000-07:00

sometimes, tearing is the last yet the best remedy for one when he/she is feeling down.

no?

sorry cousin if i scared u at the start of the work (: and thanks for joking with me all day long. . .

convo with passenger ytd.

2010-03-30T11:35:00.000-07:00

after serving and talking to him for a while..

passenger: hmm you are not local right?

me: yes i am.. paused.. huh, if i'm not local then what do i look like?

passenger: you look like indonesian.

me: LAUGHS. aiyoo.

grandma.

2010-03-30T00:55:00.000-07:00

it's been awhile since i visited grandma on sundays. somehow, i missed her so much.

honestly, it's kinda bored gg to grandma's however, i think this shouldn't be the reason for us to not visit her.. other than doing nothing there, i've been caught up with work recently on sundays:( before i started working, i was caught up with revision and stuff. i'm sucha bad granddaughter.. grr.

i miss talking, joking and listening to her(: will visit her soooooooon!

work wasn't fun at all just now. monotonous style of working. quiet and cold. irks.

i'm getting bored down there and sometimes, i don't like it when some things happened. sigh.

i can't wait for the vacation!!(:

weee! sis sis will be taking me to pedicure soon(: soo love!

some things will be done pretty sooon(: let's just wait n see..

overslept.

2010-03-27T14:46:00.000-07:00

wells..

unexpectedly, i woke up super late today for work. supposed to leave home at 6am but woke up at 6am instead. how wonderful.. blame myself for not being able to hear the alarm or...overslept too much after the alarm was off. hmmm..

i jumped out of bed immediately after hearing the door bell and dad's voice. got a super cranky morning again.

my hair was in a mess this morning, with just a hair band. no make up and with my glasses.

i guess i must have looked terrible. some colleagues questioned me with qns like 'where did you go last night ah?', 'go out with boyf ah?' and 'why you look so pale? sick ah?'..

and supervisor concluded that i'm in love. LOLS. zhenshide.

anyway, the good thing was that we were not late for work. thanks to my dearest papa for sending us to workplace. awww. amazingly, he didn't have to work today(: loves. and i soooo love him more cux he gave me cash to make new glasses. he's soooo awesome. HOHO(:

&&&.. yesterday was rather a bad day for me. my fault again. for being blur and silly. argh. sucks big time!!! GRRRRRRRRRs

on a side note, i was so pretty disappointed that i couldn't get to see max. i miss him sooooo much. i wanna give him a BIG BIG hug!! hope to see him sooooon(;

on another side note, im feeling sooooooo gay!! (: will be visiting tioman soooooon! so LOVE. finally my summer vacation is nearing! awwws.

the short hair.

2010-03-25T22:59:00.000-07:00

LOL! found this random pic. 4 years back when i got short hair. kinda funny.

anyway, JustForLaughs(:

that fear.

2010-03-24T21:38:00.000-07:00

hasn't been concentrating at work these days. my heart is in a whirl as this friday is nearing. i shall not elaborate why. i just hate this part :( i got a gut feeling something is going to happen. let's see.. i'll face up to it no matter what. . .

i've been wasting my time after work recently. argh! this is seriously bad. i got quite a handful of stuff to settle. but it's not fully done. i'm not saying i'm busy or whatsoever, just that i got no energy to settle all at once. if things are left undone, my heart will not settle down for a day or next.

EVERYTHING is in a mess now. .

awesome day to sleep in.

2010-03-23T19:32:00.000-07:00

had a pathetic 2 hours or less sleep last night:( totally listless during work and i did a big mistake. careless me. aiyoyoyoyo. in anyway, work is over for today. hope everything goes well at work tmr.hoho

&& it's sucha nice weather to sleep in. though it's not rainy, the skies were dark and cloudy. had a 4hrs nap and i thought it was a bliss(: i feel happiness now. HAHA.

anyway, final grades were out. thank God for the grades even though i didn't fare well, but at least improved as compared from the first. (: officially waiting to grad now! HOHO.

i love kinder surprise!!! saw at cold storage after work and grabbed a box! &&& the coolest thing is, it's HIPPO toy in da egg! how perfect!!

so gonna get it again!! hopefully it wont be oos so soon!!!

I WANT MANY MANY TRAYS OF KINDER SURPRISE!!! ♥ yes. i am greedy(:(:(:

loves marmie + yami yogurt!

2010-03-20T01:12:00.000-07:00

today's my off day! no plans actually except for the night, going back for guitar practice.

actually, i've no heart to learn whatsoever. i just miss the days being there, as a student and the people there. again, i'm missing something.

walking alone back to school in the evening with my mp3 on was pretty much awesome! the skies were blue as though they were painted using blue poster color. everything seemed to be in slow pace and totally relaxing.

i'd love to look at the blue skies again someday..

having said that, i went back school in the evening because i had a wonderful time with marmie earlier on. though i was pretty pissed off with her initially for disturbing my sleep:( i forgave cuz she woke me up for my well being; breakfast with her. i skipped mine today.

i decided not to on my laptop after i woke up cux i will definitely feel vvvv lazy! instead, i jumped to her bed and had a 45mins heart to heart talk(: decided to go jp for a walk with her and i had my yami yogurt!! and lunch after that. dimsum, like finally!(:

back to work tomorrow with cousin(: i wont feel so lonely. yay!

meeting usual people after that(: guess it's so gonna be a fun fun night(:

those talks we used to have.

2010-03-19T02:56:00.000-07:00

nothing last forever and some things can never happen again.

it's already too late to treasure what we used to have when we come to realization.

this is the part when it becomes part of our memories in our lives.

all we can do is 'miss having it'..

nothing more than that.

i wish i could own that talk..

counting the days.

2010-03-17T00:40:00.000-07:00

worked like a mad dog for straight 5 hours just now. tons of email to handle, almost every few minutes new mail popped up either one or a few at once. phone calls here and there too. good thing was time pass faster that way(:

i'm tired of working, at times. ha!

had some fun just now and it's been some time since i have it. HOHO.

saw a beagle on my way to work today and it reminded me of MAX. damn thing. i really miss him. i so wanna get one when i got my own apartment. beagle or toy poodle? teehee(:

can't wait for this very moment.

i'm easily distracted these days for don't know what reasons. i could just stone while people talk to me. this is really bad.

so many whys in my head.. it's irritating!

it's gonna be another week(:

2010-03-15T12:51:00.000-07:00

this week is so gonna be my sleeping week because I don't have to wake up early at 5am every morning! YAY! But on the other side, it's harder for me to go out :( unless late at night.

I'm going to church camp this June at M'sia but my passport expired 2 days ago. I need to renew my passport ASAP! Hopefully by this week. TEEHEE.

ohyea, last night was my first time to jalan kayu with some guys. HA! I know I'm a lil slow. well.. I stoned almost the whole night out. I was totally tired..

sometimes, i can't figure what i want..

if only i could stay home.

2010-03-14T14:34:00.000-07:00

tired after cousin's 21st celebration last night. almost dead during service just now.

gonna work soon :( during a rainy day.. i wish i could stay home right now to have a ultra nice nap.

argh.

hate the feeling after nap.

2010-03-11T20:00:00.000-08:00

feeling a lil cranky right now:( having being disturbed by phone calls during sleep is the worst thing ever and I really hate it luh. Now I wish I'm going to be sick!! having blocked nose and slight headache now. This feeling sucks to the MAX! :( and.. i really miss Max luh :'( I WANT TO SEE HIM!!!

Received a call from my dearest Sq during work. Felt really apologetic that I couldn't have much time hearing her out and I guess she felt really really lousy today.. For my dearest sq.. I wish you will have a better day each day!! Filled with smiles EVERY single day(: and I LOVE YOU!! hugs(:

Work has drained me out thoroughly. Feeling so listless after work:( BOO.. Easy and monotonous job can kill one too. Should I go for a full time job? In a dilemma but this ain't no big issue for now(:

UNI UNI UNI. sigh. Don't really like when people ask about it. Don't know why. Let's just wait for the outcome alright. I don't want to add on to my stress, at least for now.

I want to watch movie!!! Can someone please date me out for a movie pretty pleaseee? hohohohoho.

I'm so gonna make a new specty soon!! (: weeeets!

the very sweet craving(:

2010-03-09T20:21:00.000-08:00

Sweetest craving;

just a casual remark and ... (: thank you, thoughtful man.

On a side note, should I continue working or help out with us2pets? or both? This really makes me ponder.. It's all about decision making again.

Sometimes, I really hope I can be selfish and have it all (: but I'm fully aware that it is not possible.

I ended up staying at home again. I intended to go back for practice today but my body refused to. Had bad stomach cramp at work and funnily, there's tons of work to be done at the very last minute during the knock off time thus left workplace slightly later. After the journey back to Jurong area, I decided to rest at home. So see those going to Friday(:

angry day.

2010-03-08T22:25:00.000-08:00

another pissed off day!! encountered rude customer on phone this afternoon. it really boiled me!! ARGHHHH! on the other hand, i'm really angry with that someone who gave my no. away to play dare. HELLO?! still play this kind of game? i really would LOVE to know who is that GREAT FRIEND of mine. idiotic! please don't make me lose trust in my friends.

My phone finally died on me after 4 years. I shall be phone-less for days i guess.. till i get myself a new one. Sis lent me her Nokia phone but I'm so not used to using and I don't like. Anything, just call my hse(:

can't I have a happy day? just for once?

shopping before work.

2010-03-05T00:47:00.001-08:00

Went down earlier to have lunch with sis sis before our work at 4pm. Bought 2 heels. hurhur! Finally got the ones I wanted; love at first sight-must buy! lols. Sounds like a typical lady? Sometimes luh, not always(: Happy anyway.

I can't make it for guitar again): kinda miss.. But it's different now.. well, I'll still be back if it doesn't clash with work(: next week, perhaps.

I miss going out with many people. ahhhh!

unsettled

2010-03-03T11:47:00.000-08:00

I've got tons of things to do ): apart from work, I have to apply and vex about those uni applications. Other than that, there are this and that. I haven have time to register for this. GRRR! ): And it's been months since I made appointment with Eden Clinic.

I so wanna go IKEA & movie when I'm free!! Perhaps next week (: I guess I've influenced csy to go IKEA. Now he's the one 'pestering' me saying he wants to go. hurhur. I can't wait to meet up with Kwok & SQ for dinner!! & for the guys... it's be super long since we last met): aiyo. when? when? when?

gay days(:

2010-02-27T08:23:00.000-08:00

Despite those tired feeling after work, I'm still able to spend my days fruitfully!(: This is what I call life. No?

I had great great fun with besties after work on Thursday. It was really awesome!! I'd love to meet them up again soon!! After that meet up, thanks e for bringing me to a very nice place at ecp. I've passed by many times but that night was the first time I get in that place. BFD? Nice(:

Another fun day was yesterday. Evening was very well spent with the usual penguin staff and as usual, I'm the only lady part time with the 5 most handsome guys in Harbourfront Ctr building! LOL! Super LOL day. I love their company!! (: working and playing with them are the best thing ever.

Visited sixth avenue with csy for ice cream. Had craving for ice cream & yogurt suddenly!! Something's missing.. what's that? hmmmm

I have craving for movies too!! weee! &&& I can't wait to see Max next week!!!!

longest nap ever.

2010-02-25T01:42:00.000-08:00

After being so tired and all after work, i decided to take a nap last evening. Little did I know that it was already 1+am in the morning after receiving a call. Thanks to the call, I realized that I didn't set alarm clock for work later on which is like 3 or 4 hrs away. I guess I have sleep too long. I can't sleep now and damn, I have wasted my whole day, whole night without doing anything meaningful :( all the sms were not replied, with my hp lying next beside me and now I'm feeling that time passed me by w/o me knowing!! It's Thursday now! woah! How fast!

But I'm glad it's Thursday now! Cuz, I will be meeting Besties after work!! and good thing is, they will be coming near my workplace to meet me. (: aww. .

I was absolutely lethargic yesterday during work. I swear that feeling was damn sucky! I don't really enjoy late nights now actually, especially when I have to get up VERY early in the morning and yes, i meant VERY!! early, like 5am.

I feel like job hunting(: I'm okay with my current job now, just that I feel I can gain more experience? hmmm..

shall get back to rest before preparing for work!

goodnight!(:

what went wrong?

2010-02-20T19:32:00.000-08:00

i'm feeling VERY cranky today. LACK OF SLEEP! :( stayed up at cousin jan's till 4 in the morning. I'm getting older now and I do not have the energy for late nights anymore...

I'm supposed to go out with people. but all canceled :( grr! i hate myself for being such a crazy person!! :'( feeling better after letting all out.

it's nice of sy to call me up and play guitar and piano for me earlier on. thankyou!!! even though u won't be reading this.

i wanna catch percy jackson!!!!! AHHH! i so freaking missed it today :(

i feel awkward w/o ur reply suddenly.

what's next?

2010-02-19T00:23:00.000-08:00

applied for smu and ntu just now though i know my chances of getting in are vvvvvvvv low. but heck, there may be miracle? HA! shall apply SIM tomorrow. anyway, it's so tedious to fill in the form! I HATE!!! grr!

had a long nap just now. but what's wrong with my head. it's so heavy! :( hmmm.. i need some planning now.. so many things are needed to be done. where should i start? grr!

I WANT TO GO FOR A HOLIDAY!! anyone? (:

awesome day.

2010-02-13T10:08:00.000-08:00

I SMELL FREEDOM!!! happiest thing ever :D

it's lunar eve again. i always love this day. spending time together with family(: awwwwwesome!

got the goodies and ingredients for steamboat ytd. weets. Reunion would be the nicest part of the day.

wasting my time.

2010-02-11T18:45:00.000-08:00

consumer psychology ut down. it was a 90min test and i only learnt about it 5min before the test. HA. 830 test is good luh. and i've wasted my day time sleeping): i should have gone shopping instead!! sy asked me to go with him but i told him i wanted to study for tmrw's. but heh.. till now i've not started. bad hurr..

&&& thank God i passed my fyp2!(:

time to mug again!! argh. tmrw's paper is a nightmare!!

jealousy.

2010-02-11T00:48:00.000-08:00

i'm jealous of people who are done with their ut 3! seriously i am! :(

and i hate those who showed off lar. irritating!!

BOOO! but those who don't, i love you and please enjoy ur holiday now(:

out of all uts, i got the least confidence for friday's! argh. scary shit.

and i have craving for chicken wings suddenly. WEIRD. hurrr.

(: goodnight, earthlings.

the surprise

2010-02-06T13:48:00.000-08:00

Thankyouuu, sender(:

time to study! but am looking forward to cny!!

reunion dinner, ang baos collecting, snacks & visiting!!

will be working on the 2nd and 3rd day of cny. hopefully it won't wear me out totally!

to or not to?

2010-02-03T01:32:00.000-08:00

i may give this blog a closure soon (: but i will not delete it.

3 years of memories..

SLEEP TIME. GOODNIGHT, loves.

2010-01-27T12:01:00.000-08:00

not been in school for lesson for 3 days (: seems like holidays. but i will be back to school tmr!

i need to work cuz im very broke now!! :(

i want to save for holiday trips! (:

can't wait...

awaken thoughts

2010-01-11T01:40:00.000-08:00

i can't sleep now but am forcing myself to sleep soon!

anyway, 7 days to go!

it's time for some planning ..

2010-01-10T01:47:00.000-08:00

for the first time.. i needed someone so badly by my side.

well..

all i want is to get rid of FYP ASAP.

then there won't be any fyp meeting or whatevaaa shytttt luh.

haven't get my things done and uts are coming up.

what the fishh! nothing but nuts!

i seriously hate my life now, for the time being.

2 more weeks and i can have an ease of mind (:(:

can't waitttt! pfff.

anywayssss, life isn't that bad after all.

thanks mimi(mum hates me for calling her that! HAHA! well, i don't care. i likeee :p) for pampering me this afternoon again(: weeets LOVE YOUUU most!

wondering..

2010-01-07T13:38:00.000-08:00

when will i recover? ):
it's been 3 weeks..

LOA or not? *ponders..

i pray for recovery..

2009-12-27T13:54:00.000-08:00

it's been 5 days and no sign of recovery. wanted to go back to the same doc but it's not open.

Thus, went to another clinic which I've been before. This time round, doc gave me different med from the previous. If I've not recovered within 5 days, I need to go back for a jab.

well... i rather have that jab now seriously.

It's been days since I go out.. I'm stuck at home and I spent most of the time sleeping. What a waste.. there goes my holidays..

I want to do many things...

singing, movies, swimming and many many moreeeee..

and the first thing i need to do now is study for ut and fyp!!

grrr.. FML

despite all, Happy Birthday to PAPA!

sick on the xmas

2009-12-23T18:34:00.000-08:00

sick sick sick on the xmas..? :( i don't like it..

damn thing. skin allergy and flu..

i wish for speedy recovery!!!!

visited a doc finally.. the pill makes me super drowsy x.x

i really got no mood for xmas this year ... feel like staying alone at home to celebrate.

shd i? shd i not?

grrrrr :(

wake-up surprise

2009-12-21T23:58:00.000-08:00

he asked for my full address. i thought it was nothing.

and during my sleep this morning at 6am, i heard marmie talking and brought in a bag containing a pkt of VapoDrops and Jap bread with a sweet lil note (: i was half-awake then.

i thought it was a dream.. until i see it with my naked eyes when i was fully awake.

:D thanks silly for this surprise.

i guess u were at my doorstep at 5plus am!

silly yet sweet thing (:

drastic change

2009-12-18T00:11:00.000-08:00

i'm very sure of one thing right now.

i'm not the one who has changed. it's you, since then.. (:

i miss you -the one i knew, not the one i know.

WEEE!

2009-12-16T23:05:00.000-08:00

omyomygwad!! i can't believe it!

MIS ut1 grade is simply loveeeeee!

Thank you, God :D

i love the beach, sand, water & wind!

moreeeeeee of this pleaseeeee.

just be true to yourself :D

saturday!

2009-12-12T12:26:00.000-08:00

oneeeee moreeee day of school and welcome 3 weeks of holidays! (:

goshh. have not done with my revision for retail & hospitality systems. wanted to do it ytd night as i thought there won't be any distractions. little did i know, near 10 ppl came and talked to me in msn. it's a very very rare thing. hahahahaha. but i'm fine with it. in fact, it's a great thing to talk to all of them :D

thanks peeps, esp lun.. at least, he can tell :D

well well well. i really hate the distraction of construction work outside my house!!

(: but it's gonna be a great saturday ahead i guess..

and .. i miss penguin's pt staff.. the date with them has been postponed. i can't waitttt to meet them!!! :D

it's nice to keep in contact with one of my pri friends..

exchanged sms till i fell asleep last night. and i was asleep at 3plus. hohohoho.

igotpandaeyesagain :(

hehehehe

finally back to where we were!

2009-12-04T00:09:00.000-08:00

had a fab friends-therapy just now

it's been so long since we laughed so hard together. i really miss those days.

our thinking have changed, but for the better.

heart-to-heart talk with them is absolutely love!! i'll always know what i want at the end.

now, i guess i'll REALLY do what i think is right for me.

thanks wonderful friends of mine. only U can understand me so well. 10+years of friends, is definitely worth. worthy than anything else.

LOVES.

have i really straightened out my thoughts?

2009-11-30T23:24:00.000-08:00

for a moment my senses wake me up

and i'm clear of what i have been doing for the past months

i know what i'm supposed to do now

and i swear that was the last time.

never will i commit myself into such thing anymore. it's really silly.

sometimes, it's nice that people are asking to know more about you.

thanks silly friend for telling me. it made my day a lil in class, at least.

and hi stranger (:

&&.. im so disappointed with myself.. i used to speak quite fluent Hokkien.

but not now anymore.. marmie and papa laughed at my disastrous Hokkien.

i replaced words that i don't know to English words and those heard, laughed at me.. :(

grrr. i need to 'revise' soon. hehes.

lesson at 915am tmr

grr. i need to wake up early again.

my leg hurts on the 3rd day again. ouch!

supposed to do fyp. . .

i got no mood to do it today.

okay, please don't nag at me. i don't need nagging now.

i know what i'm doing.

good day ahead, earthlings.

bye, nov.

goodnight

2009-11-29T00:56:00.000-08:00

caught ninja assassin earlier on. awesome!

rain's hwat! :D

I MISS YOU FOR DON'T KNOW WHAT REASON. PFFT.

harder than you know

2009-11-28T15:21:00.000-08:00

it's nothing.

i just need to kick that habit of mine and i guess everything will be back to normal.

i still want to go for holiday trip. prolly not this December.

some time ago..

2009-11-25T00:22:00.000-08:00

i have no courage to say.

but i think it's better left unsaid..

i wish..

2009-11-20T22:17:00.000-08:00

i wish i have better time management

screwed up!

never expect things to happen cux it won't.

never look forward to anything cux there is nothing other than disappointment.

never again.

IHATENAGGINGS. PLEASE DON'T NAG AT ME AND THINK THAT IT'S FOR MY OWN GOOD.

THANK YOU.

just a general thought.

thoughts

2009-11-19T01:40:00.000-08:00

i couldn't do today's ut and i think it's tough. am i the only one that think so?

ahhhh.. whatever. all ut 1 down. next would be fyp stress as tasks are stacking up slowly.

i'm so glad to have that conversation in msn. that same old feeling. it's back to life now (:

as usual.. we can talk about anything or everything under the sun, the moon, the skies and anything -just name it. laughing out loud to myself and to my laptop is a definite thing. i can hardly do that to others conversation. anyway, had a good time conversing in the day!!

the skies are nice tonight. i wish i'm at somewhere else now..

no one knows where. boo.

goodnight, earthlings.

i know that

2009-11-16T21:05:00.000-08:00

i know i will never get that

don't regret when it freezes

it will not melt anyhow, anyway.

i swear.

i'm tired. thank you.

looking forward to meeting besties.

nothing more i can ask for cuz i know they can make me smile.

this is the only thing i can be assured of, nothing else.

2009-11-14T23:25:00.000-08:00

the weather today is aweeeeeesomeeeee!!! couldn't help but had a nap earlier on. this super nice weather stopped me from studying just now. One particular slide was still on my laptop screen for hours, even after my nap. grrr. how lazy..

back to church for prayer meeting on friday is great (:

it's a nice day to chill out but i'm stuck at home :(

more interesting days to come by pleaseeeee..

cranky me..

2009-11-12T22:46:00.000-08:00

i freaking dislike all the relief facis this sem!

mr.soon will not be ard next week. shd i absent myself too?

grrr..

after that pretty short nap i'm getting a lil oh-so-cranky now.

i hate minds game and i hate waiting.

i'll try my best to commit to you, to us.

let's continue from where we stopped (:

looking forward to that very day..

monday is not nice..

2009-11-09T20:35:00.000-08:00

i got no mood for lesson today and i was feeling so tired during ut.

grr.

i freakin hate monday (:

she's back?

2009-11-08T00:05:00.000-08:00

shouldn't i be happy upon receiving that sms?

instead i'm feeling worry and numb.

i'm used to living this life of mine for now.

probably it will change ..?

vexed ..

someone, please take me to a holiday?

reflections over.. and i'm lovin it..

2009-11-05T23:54:00.000-08:00

yes. i'm smiley tonight :D

i just love it. not just because performance's over..

another reason behind it. teeeheee :D it's like a dream come true.. hahahahahaha

how possibly can i sleep tonight.. tell me so..

wonderful tonight~

and it's gonna be a good good night :D

but ut's a spoiler tmr! :(

complaints

2009-11-02T21:09:00.000-08:00

the weather is so nice but this week shucks!!

i hate tues to thurs.

can't wait for it to end...

UTs coming up.. fyp task not yet done..

i wish to have 48hrs a day.. okay, blame myself for my bad time management.

it's time to study!

but i'm so sleepy :[

i wish i'm braver

2009-11-01T23:09:00.000-08:00

only if i'm braver..

only if things are simpler..

trust me, we'll be distant.. is that what you want?

i really wish to go for a vacation..

school's a hindrance!!

i want holidayssssss!!

time to commit to the right thing.

got to let go of some commitments now...

can't accept? i'll quit :] simple as that.

goodnight, earthlings.

wondering what causes my drowsiness..

damn thing!

i'm happy

2009-10-31T22:05:00.000-07:00

today is such an awesome day!

i love i love i love :D

marmie posed me an 'IF' question suddenly and I was speechless.

simply because i don't have the answer to it..

family day!!!

2009-10-31T12:47:00.000-07:00

looking forward to later! :D

frown.no.more!

i just want to be happy

untitled

2009-10-28T21:08:00.000-07:00

:'[

reminisces .. i miss the past.

2009-10-24T20:28:00.000-07:00

somehow, i miss the past

i miss the way we became friends

i miss the way we waited for each other and chatted in msn for long hours

i miss the way you commented on my dp

i miss the way you encouraged me using those words

i miss the way you text me when i was working, when i was studying and when i was doing my art

i miss the random messages sent by you

i miss the way you passed things to me :]

i miss the way we told each other our life

i miss the way we chatted on phone

i miss the way you called me

i hate&miss waiting for your smses while you were in ns

i miss the day you called me before you catch your plane

i miss that very day

i miss that day you passed me the gift bought from your trip

it was never easy to have you in my mind

though things are different now, i'd still miss the past :]

you brought me back to the past for a lil while ..

ohh-soo-stressedd

2009-10-21T21:58:00.000-07:00

for no reason..

feeling stressed! i hate it!

:'[

goodnight.

pillow-bolster dreams.

lethargic days..

2009-10-21T00:10:00.000-07:00

frankly, i was pretty fed up yesterday..

i don't give a damn anyway..

i wont ask anymore. never.

i'm easily agitated these days.

pms? yes.. whatever you call/say. this reason has became my excuse long time ago..

i don't care.

i realized people around me are changing slowly.

over-sensitive? yes. i'm that sort :]

take it or leave it.

i don't give a damn either.

on a side note, i decided to be ignorant about things going on around me from now on.

i'm sure it'll be better that way.

*people change, so do i.

i'm human being too*

thoughts for post 21st birthday

2009-10-18T20:50:00.000-07:00

guess it's time to pen down some thoughts after the 21st birthday celebration..

finally am gg to fall sick after so much of preparation and definitely, i'm not the only one.

in fact, many people had helped me out a lot on the preparation. I've yet to thank them personally. i know who were the lovely people :] and all i could say is that, i had a wonderful family; all the aunties and uncles and cousins are gifts from God, i swear. nothing is better than that and of course my own family, papa, marmie, sis sis and sly.

I really appreciate those who turned up yesterday. I know that some had a hard time travelling to that place and deep down, i know the names very well. i will thank them personally if i have the chance to.

lastly, it's over.

finally :]

i really wonder what's with me

2009-10-14T22:09:00.000-07:00

for a moment i need someone

for another, i don't need.

and i like being alone when i'm down.

i don't like what happened today.

everything happened today made me tear.

tears are just solution to cleanse the eyes i supposed.

finally the night falls, good night.

i seriously hate this day!